


Nightmares

by FebruaryGemini



Series: Villains Being Humans (Or At Least One Of Them) [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety, F/M, Post-Canon, Sleepless nights
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:46:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26636809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FebruaryGemini/pseuds/FebruaryGemini
Summary: Both Sylas and Delilah struggle with some PTSD and figure out how to live after everything that’s happened.
Relationships: Delilah Briarwood/Sylas Briarwood
Series: Villains Being Humans (Or At Least One Of Them) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1926493
Comments: 7
Kudos: 8





	1. I'm Right Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neither of the Briarwoods are getting back to sleep tonight.

Delilah started awake in the wee hours of the morning. Some part of her had believed that once the Whispered One was dealt with, she’d get a decent night’s sleep. But this was the third nightmare in as many days and she was sick and tired of it. There was very little light, but the pale fabric of the rumpled sheets beside her revealed a distinct lack of husband. 

Her breath caught in her throat. She’d woken up in an empty bed before and had no one to run to. He’d been there when she went to bed, right? She’d seen him, alive, just yesterday. Or had it been a week? She sat up. What was the status of the ritual? She had already cast the spell, right? Well, she’d cast it once, but that was years ago. Had she done it recently? She remembered it like it was yesterday. Everything was overlapping and getting muddled. How many times had she…? He was alive now, wasn’t he? Her eyes filled with tears. “...Sylas?”

There had been nights when he didn’t answer and she had to cry herself back to sleep; but at the sound of his name, he turned away from the window and sat on the bed, taking his wife in his arms. “I’m here. I’m right here, and I’m fine.”

She sagged against him, wetting his shoulder with her tears. He smoothed his hand over her hair and the tension melted away.

\-------

Sylas stared at the canopy above him. Vampires didn’t need sleep like humans. Vampires weren’t very much like humans at all. Delilah was fast asleep. He turned over again. It wasn’t that he was ungrateful; he’d accept life as a sentient teacup if it meant he could be with her. He still remembered the days before he died the first time, and that was the only coherent thought he had. He wanted her to be there. He wanted to be where she was. He wanted them to be together. Now they were together. He had everything he wanted. Being immortal was just the icing on the cake. But being a vampire, especially at night, was like having an itch that you can’t scratch. It did wax and wane though. Some nights he could sleep beside her until morning. Other nights he was so restless that staying indoors was painful.

He tossed the covers back and threw his legs off the side of the bed. Then he sat up as slowly as he could, careful not to wake her. He leaned back to brush a kiss over her cheek before he stood. She was, without a doubt, the most beautiful woman to ever exist. The entire world and everything in it wouldn’t compensate for half of what she’d done for him. The entire planar system might come close; if he could gift her gods he would.

His feet found his slippers and he tied the sash of his robe around his waist. The night was calling to him through the cold glass of the window. The moonlight played in the pine trees, throwing lances through the fog. It was a beautiful night. He was a predator who couldn’t hunt. There! Movement in the trees. A deer, making its way across the yard. His forehead met the glass. His heart would be pounding in his chest if it pounded at all.

Delilah was fast asleep. His wife was calling to him from the warm bed. The moonlight played over her dark hair, making her skin glow. She was beautiful. He was a husband who couldn’t sleep. Then she sat up, eyes wide and breathing hard. He looked away. This was the third night in a week that her sleep had been disturbed. If he could have one wish granted it would be that this plague of nightmares would stop.  _ Leave my wife alone. She’s only human and she needs her rest. _

“...Sylas?”

He was at her side in half a second. “I’m here. I’m right here, and I’m fine.”  _ And I love you, and your pain hurts me, and I will say and do anything to make it better. _ He smoothed his hand over her hair, petting the tension away as she cried into his shoulder.


	2. Do You Want To Go Hunting?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They reach an agreement.

They sat like that for some time. The moonlight slipped off the bed and crawled across the floor. The tears dried on her cheeks. His hand kept running through her hair. Eventually, he broke the silence with a whisper. “Do you think you’ll be able to get back to sleep?”

She took a minute to think before she shook her head. “I hate it. It’s over. We won. I have everything I’ve ever wanted. Everything except a decent night’s sleep.”

“We just have to get used to being at peace.”

Another moment of silence before she asked, ”why are you up?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“Again?”

“I’m not meant to be indoors on a night like this. I saw a deer outside, walking along bold as anything. I wanted its blood on my hands.”

“...I’m sorry.” 

He pulled the blankets out from between them and gathered her into his arms. She reached out and took her robe off the hook on the bedpost. Then he stood and carried her downstairs.

The halls were dark, and cool, and quiet. The servants had all put themselves away once the work was done. Delilah couldn’t see more than vague shapes, but she knew her husband wouldn’t stumble. She adjusted her robe over her knees and then wrapped her arms around his neck.

\-------

She snapped her fingers and the lamps in the kitchen burst into flame, bathing the room in a warm glow. He set her down on a chair and kissed her forehead before going over and starting water for tea. She stood up to put her robe on properly and then sat back down to wait. She could feel the pressure of tears behind her eyes. It didn’t make sense. The Whispered One had been raised to godhood and promptly banished to the other side of the Divine Gate. The deal was complete, and the conflict with Vox Machina along with it. There was no reason to cry anymore. But perhaps now there was time. Now she had time to cry for all the times she couldn’t. Perhaps it was like Sylas said. Perhaps they just had to get used to being at peace. She folded her arms on the counter and set her head on the cushion they made.

Once the water was started, he went back and ran his hand over her shoulders. It helped keep his mind off things. A deer was just a cheap trinket. It wouldn’t last long, and there wasn’t any point. He was not a feral beast that attacked anything that moved. He was a skilled warrior, a pragmatic strategist, and a formidable swordsman. A deer wasn’t worth his time. Thick warm blood under his claws; running down his arms; oozing from between his fingers. The heartbeat, forcing it out of the twitching carcass gradually slowing to match his own. Some might argue that it wasn’t worth it, but deer could scream as well as humans. So it wasn’t keeping his mind off anything.

“Darling, are you alright?”

He blinked, unclenching his fist from her robe. The tea kettle was screaming on the stove. “...yes. Sorry.”

She sat up as he went to pour the tea. “Are you sure?”

He sighed. “I suppose I just have to get used to being at peace.”

She stood and crossed the kitchen to take the kettle from him, setting it down on the counter. “Darling, are you  _ sure? _ ”

His shoulders dropped and he seemed almost apologetic when he said, “Delilah, I’m a predator now. I’m not tamed. I don’t want to hurt you, and I don’t know what to do.”

Part of her wanted to say that she’d let him go hunting, the way one might let a cat out at night. But then she remembered how she’d felt when she woke up. She needed him near. She took his hands in hers. She needed him near. If he felt trapped though… She could sacrifice this. She’d sacrificed everything else, this was nothing. She could wake up alone every morning. He’d go out and be what a vampire should be. He’d be happy. Until he saw what it was doing to her. He’d want to give up hunting. He’d stay inside if it killed him just so she wouldn’t wake up alone. “...do you want to go out and go hunting?”

_ Yes! _ No. He was restless and bloodthirsty, but they’d been torn apart too many times. He’d spent nearly a year without her, and he wasn’t keen on doing that again. Maybe if she came with him... they fought better together anyway. Maybe if they just didn’t give up this high-stakes lifestyle… or at least not so easily. He tightened his fingers around hers. “I don’t want to be away from you. I would love to go hunting, but I don’t want you to be alone.”

She pulled her hands away and wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning against him. “Then we’ll go hunting together. Maybe not every night, but it will be good for us to get out of the house sometimes.”

He kissed her hair and held her close. “The tea water is getting cold.”

“Let it. It’s just water.”


	3. What's On Your Mind, My Love?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few nights later, and things haven't changed much.

She sat at the vanity in her nightgown, brushing her hair over her shoulder. Her face was so serious. What was she thinking about? Which tragedy weighed on her today? He crossed the room in silence and set his hands on her shoulders, making her jump. “Oh! Sylas, I swear! You could at least  _ say _ something.”

He chuckled. “Sorry. Would you like me to wear a bell?”

“Oh heavens no. The constant ringing would drive me mad.” 

He gathered her auburn locks in his hands and ran the brush through them again before separating them into three strands and beginning to braid. She watched her hair dance on its own in the mirror, twisting over itself without any visible aid. When she’d woken up the last time, every mirror in the house had been covered over. Of course, this was after nearly a year of being dead. She could imagine how painful it must have been to have all these mirrors with nothing in them. Like portraits missing their subjects. And every one featured his wife. Honestly, she would have covered the mirrors too.

“What’s on your mind, my love?”

She sighed. There was so much and none of it was really the problem.

He tied off the braid with a ribbon and laid it down over her shoulder. “You look so unhappy. Is there anything I can do?”

She reached up to stop his hand from leaving. “Tell me that it’s over. Tell me that this won’t be ripped away again. I can’t wait until we’re out of this aftermath. I want to be used to being at peace.” He turned his hand to cup her cheek, sliding his thumb up behind her ear as she continued. “I saw the house in flames last night. You were screaming and I didn’t know where you were.”

“You know where I am now. These things won’t be ripped away. It is over. These nightmares will fade and every new memory will be a pleasant one.”

“...thank you.”

She couldn’t see his face. She didn’t know that he was reassuring himself as much as he was reassuring her. These nightmares would fade. Eventually, he’d be able to close his eyes without seeing the Dimension Door fizzle out, revealing an arrow through her face.

“What’s on your mind, my love?”

He blinked. She’d turned around and thrown his words back at him with a tired smile. He couldn’t help but smile back, if only for a second. “I’m undead. I’ve died five times. I haven’t had a heartbeat in thirteen years. My wife has died three times. I close my eyes and see you bound with vines. I watch the light leave your eyes. I hear your scream.”

She stood up and took his face in her hands. “I’m not screaming now. You won’t die again. Neither will I. I love you, and we will get used to being at peace.”

He pulled her against him. “You don’t get to leave again.”

“I don’t plan to.” She mumbled into his shoulder.

“Come to bed, Delilah.”

“Will you be able to sleep?”

“Tonight? Yes.”

She went to shut the curtains to keep the sun from waking them while he climbed into the bed. Then she tucked the covers in around him and drew the curtain on his side of the bed before going around to join him.


	4. You Can Wake Up Anytime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A peek into two different dream worlds.

The house was in flames again. The house in Wynandir. She ran through the halls, opening every door, checking in every room. Sylas was around here somewhere. She could hear him as clearly as if he was standing next to her. He was calling to her, begging her to find him.

“Delilah, where are you?” He was in bed. He didn’t even have the strength to stand. “Why aren’t you here? Delilah, I need you.”

She had the cure in her hand.

The flames spoke with His voice.  _ It’s too late. He’s already dead. He’s been dead for years. _

“Where are you?!” He was panicking now, trying to get out of bed.

Elsie responded, far too calm for being in a burning house. “She’s gone, sir. She’s looking for a cure. She’ll be back… soon. She’ll be back soon.”

Every door just revealed more fire. Her lungs were starting to burn from the smoke. He wasn’t up here. She ran down to the ziggurat. It was too early, but this was the only chance she’d get. An arrow zipped past her ear. Sylas was waiting at the top, reaching down to help her up the last few steps.

“What are you doing? Darling, you should be in bed.” A second arrow sprouted from her chest. No. Not again. Not here. She turned to face them. Each of them was brighter than the sun. The room was filled with light. She heard her husband scream behind her. She still had the cure in her hand. “Why can’t you leave us alone?!” The ground erupted with skeletons, dragging Vox Machina to their knees. Didn’t there used to be more than three? The Whispered One stepped out of the gate behind her, hand outstretched to bend the undead to his will. It was incredible. They never had the chance to fight back.

Once they had disappeared beneath the dirt, she turned to look at Him. Doing so sent a bolt of terror through her heart. He was livid. His voice drowned out every other thought in her mind.  _ I gave you everything. I gave you your husband. I gave you shelter. I gave you purpose. I gave you power. I gave you  _ life! _ And in return, you bring my enemies to my doorstep? _

“No, I-! I didn’t! I would never! I-!”

His eye flashed with a sickly green light. She was thrown through the air. The cure flew out of her hand. She landed on her back in the middle of the skeletons. They were as ravenous as piranhas. She woke up screaming.

\------

The silent darkness shattered and he sat bolt upright. It took him a second to realize why he woke up. Then he heard the gasping sobs from his wife’s side of the bed. He sighed and collapsed back onto the pillows. It really wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t she have sweet dreams? He reached out, pulled her into his arms, and attempted to go back to sleep.

She quieted down pretty quickly when he held her. He wondered if there was anything else he could do. Some memory-altering spell perhaps, or just something to erase the fear of it. He’d do some looking in the morning; when he was more awake.

Eventually, he drifted off again and dreamed of life and death.

It was Whitestone and it was the Fugue Plane. The buildings and streets were cast in grey by the moon that hung in an empty sky. No one else was here. He headed towards the castle.

He was the only soul in this plane of existence. The halls were as empty as the town. The portraits were empty chairs. He was alone. It was quiet and colorless. Then he felt a presence. He turned to look and saw Cassandra. She was on her knees in the pool of moonlight that spilled in from the window. Something glinted in her hand. It was either a locket or a knife.

“How could you do this to me? I was a girl.” She didn’t look up and her mouth didn’t move. It was like she didn’t know he was there.

“We needed the ziggurat.”

“I watched my family die.”

“Delilah killed my father. I thanked her.”

“Yes, but you didn’t love him. I loved my family. Each of them was as important to me as she is to you.”

The conviction of her statement was almost tangible. It made him sick. “Don’t you dare make that comparison. You can’t even comprehend what we have, much less replicate it. Your family was in the way. The only reason why you’re still alive is because my wife decided she liked you.”

She looked up, the illusion of blood staining the front of her dress, and then faded away.

He was alone again. The castle felt like it was in Wynandir. The grey and black became ash and charcoal. He wandered aimlessly through the halls until he felt a second presence. Delilah was in her library. The green of her dress and the red in her hair were muted to match the walls. She also didn’t seem to notice him as she flipped through one book after another.

“I saw Cassandra upstairs.”

She moved on to another leather-bound tome, but it felt like she was listening.

“She killed herself.”

It wasn’t true, but it was his best guess at what had happened. Delilah didn’t seem to care. It was one less DeRolo to worry about.

“Am I going to wake up anytime soon? I miss you.”

“Yes, dear. You can wake up anytime.” She snapped her fingers and the world disappeared into darkness.


	5. Lord and Lady Briarwood Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sylas puts a plan in motion.

“I was thinking of going into town today.”

“What? Why?” He’s been quiet all morning and then he says this? They had everything they needed in the house, and what they might run out of was provided by the small village of undead. They’d lived most comfortably at Whitestone and so Delilah had recreated that as soon as she could. Sylas did venture towards civilization to hunt, but not into town and  _ certainly _ not during the day. These past few months had been the most cautious of their lives. Going into town sounded almost reckless at this point. “Why would you need to go into town?”

“I was hoping it could be a surprise,” he said, leaning against the doorframe.

His wife marked her place in the book she’d been reading with her finger. “Sylas, darling, I love you, but I’m not really in the mood for surprises.”

She wasn’t going to let him go. They’d just discussed not leaving the other alone. She would have killed him if he’d left without saying anything, but she’d thank him once he revealed the secret. He’d finally thought of something that he could do to help her. This plan had to go through. He had to make this plan go through. “Then come with me, Delilah. It’ll be a fun adventure. We can be lord and lady Briarwood again.”

Her thoughts went to the red dress at the back of the wardrobe, with her green pendant on the gold chain, and that black shawl with the fringe. It would be nice to look like a lady again. A smile tugged at her lips just imagining the looks from the people they passed.

A smile tugged at his lips when he knew he’d got her excited.

“But what are we going to do about the sun?”

Ahh. Good point. Neither of them could control the weather and they didn’t really want to get stranded. “We can take the carriage…”

“And I can bring a parasol, but…” Parasols were for women. Sunhats were for women. Veils were for women. Women were expected and encouraged to stay out of the sun to maintain a fair complexion, but men… Men just had to burn. “I can carry the bags and you can hold my parasol like a gentleman. And I won’t complain if most of the shade falls on you.”

That got him to chuckle. “Wow. What a sacrifice.”

She only rolled her eyes and tucked a ribbon between the pages of the grimoire before setting it on the side table. “Give me ten minutes to change and we can be on our way.”

He crossed the room in two steps and set his hands on the arms of her chair, preventing her from getting up.

“Yes?”

She was so cute when she quirked her eyebrow like that. He kissed her. “Why do you have to change? You’re beautiful in this.”

Now it was her turn to chuckle. “Sylas, I know. But I have a red dress in my wardrobe that wants to be seen.”

He heard her excuse but had already fallen into her eyes. He wasn’t going to let her get up anytime soon.

She reached her arms up and interlocked her fingers behind his neck, pulling herself up to kiss him. He stood up, dragging her with him and letting his arms fall to her waist as he kissed back. She deftly turned them around so her back was to the stairs. “Ten minutes.” And then she gave him one last kiss, pulled away with a smile, and scampered up the steps.

He stood for a second, a little dazed and marveling at her ability to get her way. “What am I going to do for ten minutes?!” He shouted up after her.

The only reply was her musical laugh bouncing down the hall.


End file.
